If you're having a bad travel day, read a section or two of this book as part of your therapy. If you're constipated or the opposite of constipated, read this book while sitting on your throne, because it will make whatever isn't or is happening more fun.

For the past forty years, bad things have been happening to the author and/or those around him when he leaves his home. Go back in time with him and ask yourself, "How can all of this happen to one guy?

Is he still alive?"

It happened on a boat without a goat, but there was a goat on that plane he rode. He did drive his car to the bar, but it wasn't the car that shoved that hook through his hand. It didn't rain on his train, but he got soaked on that bird he flew.

He's just your average, middle-aged, overweight, white American who averages more than his share of bad luck. Somehow, he finds humor in his misadventures. Brighten your day at his expense.

Tired of trying to follow the plot with too much character development? Don't worry, this book has none of that. Just short stories and quips that will make you laugh out loud, groan at the author's expense, and look over your shoulder as you stand in the transportation line comparing his picture to those around you. Trust us, if you see him, cancel your reservation or confirm you are up to date on your insurance premiums.